The I'm -copying-everyone-else New Year's Post!

New Years and stuff...hmm.

Well, last year, I wanted the stuff from the Wizard of Oz:  Brains, Heart, Courage and Home.

I think I'm a little smarter.

I definitely use my heart the way I'd like to.

I don't know about courage...hmm...Have I been brave lately? I think so. I could always be braver.

I don't feel at home yet. In Toronto, in my apartment, in my own skin.

I miss my lovah. More than anything. All I can do is achieve my new new years resolutions (we made them together right before midnight on Dec 31st, at the lodge where we went skiing!):

1. Get out of debt. This is the most important thing in my life right now. How depressing is that? How boring! Oh well, it's necessary.

2. Get an agent.  yup, I'm on my way.

3. Get three paying gigs. Must get agent first.

4. Put on 3 Bottom's Dream (my theatre company) shows. One's booked for March, 2 are being written.

5. Get in shape. Again, boring. But it doesn't have to be. I just want to be skinny and healthy and glowing all the time. And I want to be able to take the stairs without losing my breath. 

Now I want all these things for myself...but is it bad that my main motivation is EG? I want him to love me and want to see me all the time. I feel like accomplishing these things quickly and spectacularly will result in us being together forever.

How I miss him. 

But I'm trying to stay positive. I keep telling myself I'm amazing and I will accomplish everything I need to and then I'll be so happy and happy people get what they want. Or is it people who get what they want become happy? Oh well, I think it's cyclical and I'm doing it.  I'm fucking spectacular and therefore I will get what I want.

I should probably get back to work now.