Weird. Looking at pictures of a wedding.
She was my friend. A good friend. We worked so well together.
He was someone I was obsessed with for three years. He kissed me. I kissed him first. We held hands. He was so funny. He made me laugh all the time.
We didn't believe in the same things so he had to stop kissing me. I was heartbroken and angry. I felt guilty because I wanted to corrupt him.
He found someone else who happened to believe the same things he did. That didn't work out.
He got back together with my friend. I don't think she wanted to be my friend anymore. She wanted to, but couldn't handle the sight of me.
I thought they had a passionless relationship. Just because they were avoiding sex, doesn't mean they were passionless.
It was in them all along. It was being saved for each other.
The pictures prove it. The way he held her, the way he kissed her.
I'm fine with it because he does nothing for me now. The pictures of him prove it. They make my past self twitch a little, but that's all.
But I can't help but think that it could have been me. I don't want it to be me, but it could have been me.
I thought he was scared of sex. I was wrong.
I hate being wrong.
(ps, he is really short. Nowhere near 6'5".)
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4 comments:
no matter how over someone i am, it's always an odd feeling to witness that they are also well and truly over me.
it always sort of sucks when someone moves on. it's totally selfish, but when they haven't you can almost feel like they're sending engergy your way. but it's also good to realize how not right you are for eachother... sort of comforting...
do you think guys feel this way about their exes? I wonder if it's just us girls sometimes.
EG told me it was just us girls.
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