Breaking My Balls

You're breaking my balls, you guys, you're breaking my balls. This'll be like my seventeenth post before you've all updated at all! This is ridonculous.

Just to fill you in on what's been going on since my most recent recent post, um, I'm obsessed with English Gentleman. He wrote me this message that I'm not sure I want to put on here. I just don't want to cheapen it. I read it to Neenia over the phone because I figured telling one person was different than broadcasting it over the internet. But I really want to broadcast it all over the internet. And I know you will all appreciate it (and by "you all" I mean Neenia (duh), Bedroom Prince, Arts Monkey, Miss Pants, Skinny Rabbit, Nosiren and a couple other hangers on who don't have blogs but know me well, you know who you are)... Should I? Just to give you a tiny hint of this amazing person (if I haven't already)...I will give you a taste.

I wanted to call him instead of talk via facebook, but I couldn't find the phone. So I said: "Oh, now I'll have to be content with fantasising about what we're gonna do when I get there. What are we gonna do when I get there?" And his reply described really hot teasing and foreplay(including "...and you will abandon your dress to the elements outside of my window, along with your underwear, declaring to all of Hampshire that you will never need it again..."). And then he described hot sex and said:

"At this point the curtains go down and the stars of the show are only seen again at local convenience stores, buying food and drink to fuel their filthy adventures. Even as they become dishevelled starry eyed wrecks over time that no one cares to measure, all that see them feel their disdain tainted by the jealously that they are having more sex than minds of the past thought feasible, let alone healthy, and the wails of ecstacy echo across crisp, enchanted sunsets onto dawns afar, where couples everywhere wonder if one day, they too, can emulate the pleasures derived from the mispent youths of Princesse Alathariel and English Gentleman."

What?! What?! (direct quote from my reaction, and Neenia's.) How is he so amazing? I don't even know how to describe him! The best word that encompasses all the awesomeness and hotness and sweetness that he is is his name.

Last night there was a slight misunderstanding. I said "isn't it funny that we've only spent three nights together? Not like 'well, we see each other at work all the time but we've only spent three nights together.' no, just we've only spent three nights together ever!" And he said "I don't find it weird. It's spectacular." To which I didn't really have a reply. Then I went to bed and he texted me thinking I was unsure about us and thinking about my ex. "For a creative mind like yours, it's natural to have doubts." But I don't have doubts! How was I to claire-ify? I texted him trying to explain and he seemed cool, but I didn't feel I was convincing him enough. I sent him a loooooong rant-y message on facebook which ended with something endearing about my journal getting sick of his name but she's too polite to say anything. I just got a reply:

"Are you a dream? I hope not. X"