This Side of February

Wow, it's been a really long time, but I'm kind of tapped out. Everything I feel like writing about, I've already written about.

You know I love EG, you know I love performing, you know I'm broke. That's pretty much my life right now...

I'm in a bit of a rut, as you know, but feeling good about it. I'm moving in with my mom again! I'm excited! It's going to be such fun, we're going to redecorate all three bedrooms (and I'm going to convince her to do the living room too...) and it'll be an awesome bonding experience before I go away with my man for the summer. I can save, pay off debt, chill with my home-homeys, bogart my mom's long distance plan, eat 3 meals a day--oh my god, my mom and I can exercise together! I'm going to get the fuck in shape! Sweet. Yes, I'm really looking forward to March. It's going to be a good month.

This is a good month too. I'm a performer. I love it. It makes me horny. I want to do it forever.

EG wants me to do it forever. He's so supportive. He said he gets breathless thinking about the show and really feels he's missing out by not seeing it. He can only afford 100 pounds for a plane ticket, but the cheapest I could find is 200. (Couldn't I have found that in December?) I miss him so much. Waking up without him is the hardest. Going to bed has been easy because I'm so tired, but I want him in the morning. It has a bigger effect on me than the winter's lack of sunlight. I feel actual heartache. I hope my absence makes his heart grow fonder. I think it is. It's funny, I kind of miss being in his bed more than I miss him being in my bed. I loved it there. But that might simply have to do with the fact that I had no responsibilities when I was there. I love taking care of him, but I don't have the means! When we go on vacation, it'll be every man for himself. Well, I've kind of decided that he'll pay for the food and I'll cook it and eat a fifth of what he eats. Fair? I think so.

Well, that's my new blog. Incoherent mumbling, unorganised rambling, girly prattling. You love me.